Japanese people are exceedingly kind. They’re so kind, in fact, that they won’t tell you honestly if your Japanese sucks.
Let’s take an example from my home country, the ol’ U. S. of A. If you walk into one of our fine fast food establishments and order your triple quarter pound meatwich with anything less than the most perfect American, the cashier is likely to lean toward you sneering and go, ‘HUNH?’
After they’ve done you the favor of understanding what you said, they may shake their head in disgust to let you know that you need to put in a little more time doing pronunciation drills.
The Japanese won’t do that. No matter what a train wreck your Japanese language skills are, they’ll invariably smile really big and say, ‘日本語上手ですね!’
In ABC’s that would be, ‘Nihongo jozu desu ne,’ which translates to, ‘Wow, your Japanese is really great!’
I remember one of the first times I went out in Japan, I managed to get out a ‘こんにちは’ (konnichiwa – hello) and this was the reply.
Really? My Japanese is amazing!? That’s all there is to it?
To me, it seemed kind of patronizing. I mean, c’mon, we both know that I struggled to get that most basic of greetings out. But I didn’t feel like they were insulting me. In fact, it almost seemed like some sort of encouragement.
And actually, that’s exactly what it is. When people say that phrase to you, what they’re really saying is, ‘Your Japanese sucks but keep trying and I know you’ll get better and I don’t want to act like your Japanese sucks because that’d be rude and make you feel bad, and then maybe you’d give up.’
It’s actually the kindest thing they could do.
Now, once your Japanese reaches the not-sucking level, they’ll stop saying that. You won’t hear it again. At some point later in the conversation, they may say something but it’ll be more genuine. For example:
‘日本語はあんまり困らないですね.’
‘Nihongo wa anmari komaranai desune.’
‘You don’t seem to have any problem with Japanese, huh?’
‘日本語はぜんぜん喋れるね.’
‘Nihongo ha zenzen shabereru ne.’
‘You can totally speak Japanese, huh?’
‘日本語ぺらぺらじゃん!’
‘Nihongo perapera jan!’
‘WTF, dude, you can f***in’ speak Japanese!’
But like I said, it’ll come later in the conversation. It won’t be the first thing they’ll say to you.
The Japanese language is hard. Luckily, Japanese people will only make fun of your bad Japanese behind your back. To your face, they’ll lie outright and tell you you’re doing a great job. I appreciate all the people over the years who’ve twiddled my ego with that phrase so that I didn’t think I totally sucked at Japanese.
ありがとう
Greg, that’s hilarious. And you’re very right about the way we handle it in the US. I’ve gone so far as to contact a large retailer and let them have it after I saw their “customer service” person rip apart a Spanish-speaking guy who was trying to communicate but just couldn’t. She said, “Learn the damn language.” That’s when she got a mini lecture from my husband and me on how hard it is to learn a language, and the company heard about it in spades.
She should have said, “Your English is okay! Keep trying.” How hard is that?
No kidding, Lori. Thanks for that. I drove me crazy when people were like that back home.
The truth is that if you’ve never bothered to try learning another language, you have no idea. And most Americans haven’t.
And then consider this – you’ve got a senior citizen with little or no education from a poor country doing their best. What, are they gonna go to Berlitz English school? That stuff really burns me up. Boy, I could rant…
It is always nice to hear that your Japanese is good even when it isn’t. Although I think some people mistakenly believe that they are perfect at Japanese when they are not just because Japanese people wont say anything rude to you about your Japanese.
You’re right, Kenda. Much better to be flattered than the other way around. I agree that most westerners I know have the opposite problem as Japanese – they think they’re language abilities are better than they really are. But then again, it’s probably better to be too confident than not confident enough. If you’re too shy about your language abilities, you just won’t talk to anybody. I was there years ago myself. Thanks for the comment!
Pfffft! Hahaha! That’s hilarious. Now, I’ve been learning Japanese for about two years, it really is hard since it has no relation to English whatsoever. It’s not like French, or something. The difference between usage of boy or girl and formal or informal are just hard to memorize, ya know? You write with feeling and humor, that is just, awesome.
Dani, thanks a lot for the comment (and compliment!). Yes, learning Japanese messes up your mind. I speak it pretty well but still have TONS of trouble with formal vs. informal usage. Even Japanese people do apparently. But it’s definitely an interesting experience.
My Japanese is soooo ridiculously bad. Thankfully the Japanese are very kind as you say. How long did it take you to become fluent? I have my doubts I’ll ever learn!
Hey Adele… well, as to whether or not I’m fluent, it’s still a bit of a work in progress in all honesty. But I’d say it took me several years living here and studying regularly before I could hold a coherent conversation. Well worth it though. Ganbatte!